05 January 2010

On Pacifiers

Being the youngest of 5 children who became an aunt at 13, I did a lot of babysitting growing up. As a result, I had some very definite ideas about certain things involving raising children. Pacifiers (or nuks) were just one of these things. My sister-in-law's kids all used nuks. My sister's did not. There were a few times when I was left with my sister's youngest, nuk-free baby and I had no way of soothing said child. My babes, I promised, would all be nukie babies!

So, Peter was born and true to my word, he use a nuk. Loved it in fact! So much so, that I didn't take it away until he was 3 1/2 (my Mom and Dad were sick, there was a lot going on, I thought it would be mean to do it). Drew was exactly the same! He loved his nukie-although he gave his up a bit younger (3). I asked him about it yesterday, and he said he missed his nuk (sweet).

Then we had Michael. My dear, sweet, Michael whom, I have said before, brings out the best and the worst in Andy and I as parents. He refused any nuk-and we tried many. He was also my colicky child, and would have benefited from it, but no go!

Now, we turn to my baby girl, Alex. She seemed to be turning into a nukie baby-at first. Now, though, she seems to be going the way of Michael. She wants nothing to do with it-most of the time. And then, every once in a while, she takes it. Most of the time, though, she won't, and I can hear her slurping on the heel of her hand in her crib.

I feel like I am at a crossroads. I am not sure what to do. I really do believe in the power of the pacifier as a tool to calm down an infant. As a non-nurser, I've always felt like it was important. I remember telling my husband's sister, that you just need to work with them. All babies like nuks. HMMM...starting to re-think that. Thoughts?

13 comments:

Jamie said...

I think nukie's are good. Bridget DOES take a nukie, we worked towards it though. She is also good without it, it helps with those hard times.

Babies need to suck. it's good for them. I have no facts to back that up, but I did read that somewhere and believe it to be true.

My first did not take a nuk, anything in his mouth, he spit out!

My second, born a super sucker (my best nursing experience) loved a nukie and we actually only let her have it at bedtime, in the van and at Mass. at age 3, she wrapped all of them up for a friend's new baby. She was only sad the 2nd night, when she said with sad big eyes "I miss my nukie" I explained baby Eva needed them (my friend actually threw them all away) and she nodded with big tears in her eyes in agreement. Last she ever said anything about them.

3rd and 4th children not nukie babies. at. all.

I think if they take it, give it to them, they must need that textile feeling in their mouths, that need to suck and feel things. Others don't need that.

Just my opinion...

Dawn Farias said...

Oh, honey, I think if they won't take it then there's not much you can do about it! Doesn't hurt to try, though. Good luck!

Kim H. said...

I second what Dawn said. I think each kid either likes it or not. And don't feel bad -- the pluggy fairy came the night of Molly's 4th birthday and took hers away. Just last year was a lot of change going on already and I didn't want to deal with it. She did fine.

Some kids love them, others not so much. She'll let you know what she wants. :)

Hugs!

Sarah - Kala said...

Mine were all about three when they said bye to them. I think it's more traumatic when parents think it will be. Most of the time kids are looking for clues from us . . . anyway . . . I agree that a babe who won't take one is better off w/out it and she'll find another way to soothe herself.

Nancy said...

I tried with all three of mine...Amelia was the only one who took it for about 3 weeks.
Just let her suck on her hand....she'll be fine! You, on the other hand, might need a drink now and then!:) Oh..and none of mine are thumb suckers either!

Herd Momma said...

All of mine took them off and on. Luckily we never had any major issues with getting rid of it. Audrey was fairly attached for awhile right when she turned 1 then no big didn't want it anymore after about 3 months. My concern was that they'd become thumb suckers. I did nurse so when giving the pacie I would hold them like I was nursing then stick the pacie in and hold them there for awhile. William was my only really fussy baby and God Bless him, he slept with us and nursed. Yes I paid the horrible prices for allowing this. All is good now. :)
Good Luck. Hope something begins to work for you. MAYBE, she's a blankie baby. If you're looking for something to sooth her perhaps an animal/blanket/burpy.......
Good Luck. God Bless.

Clare LoCoco said...

She defs likes her baby blankets wayyy better!

Christy said...

None of my babies will tolerate a pacifier at all! Will screams if he SEES one I have tried it so often HA HA. Layton was formula fed and even though he was used to a bottle he still wouldn' t take a paci...

I wouldn't stress about it at this point :)

Jamie said...

Re-reading what I wrote, I didn't finish...I remember having to end it abrubtly...hmmmm, kids?

What I wanted to say was out of 5 of my kiddos, 2 liked nukies and 3 did not and they are all fine!! It doesn't matter whether they do or don't take a nuk. Some people think it a bad thing to take one, I don't think it is. Some people think it a good thing...it really depends on the kid.

Is that better? Sorry about that!

Therese said...

Thanks everyone for the points of view! I just wanted her to be a nuk baby-silly I know! OOOH and did she ever wail for Daddy tonight while I taught!!!

Gramma 2 Many said...

Don't worry!! She will do whatever she wants!

Homeschoolmum4Christ said...

Hi Therese,
Our children didn't have dummies, but our son sucked his thumb, and we couldn't throw that away.

Given my time over, I would give our children dummies. :)

Blessings,
Jillian

Aussie Therese said...

I am pretty sure all 7 of ours have had a dummy. (thats what we Australian's call them) and all of them have loved them. The only baby I remember having problems with taking the dummy from was Brigette. In hind sight though, I took it from her too early for her. (she was 2). Christopher gave it up on his own at about 3.