So, I am starting to get nervous. All of these weeks of preparation are soon to come to a close sometime in the next month. I was doing some cleaning today in the room that will be shared by Michael and the baby. We have received a few gifts, and my nieces are throwing me a shower in a couple of weeks. Just trying to get everything in order.
As I am cleaning out the closet, a thought pops into my head...what if she is a boy again? Of course, in the end, it doesn't matter if baby is healthy, but last time, my mother-in-law and I had purchased several pink items which all were detagged, washed and readied for baby. When Michael was born, these quickly got swapped out for the clothes that Peter and Drew had worn. This time, I am afraid to cut tags. I have some items hanging in the closet, just waiting, just in case they need to be returned.
Then, there is the whole impending birth issue. I had 3 successful deliveries. Drew was almost a c-section because his arm was stuck near his head, and Michael was also almost a cesarean because he chose not to turn until 3 days before he was born. I am still nervous. I see the doctor on Wednesday. He will check me then to see if I have started to dilate. More than likely, I have because well, I have been known to walk around at 2-3 cm for weeks, but being at that point is making me nervous. It's just so close, and although I have had moments of feeling like this pregnancy is dragging, I am now feeling like I don't want it to be over.
I just need to breathe....and pray.