09 December 2009

Time of the season

I am in a funk today. We were supposed to have the snowstorm of all snowstorms, and areas around us did. An hour west of here has 17 inches so far. We've gotten about 4 inches of snow, followed by rain and now it is snowing again. All schools in the area are closed except in our county.

Yes, I wanted snow-and lots of it! I was hoping to have a day with all of the kids that was unexpected and spend the day baking cookies and bread. (My Mom always said that the best time to bake bread was when it was snowing.) So, I am just disappointed.

I haven't felt like blogging much either lately. Not a lot to say. Working through my feelings over my sister's impending bypass surgery. I am trusting in God that she will be fine-she has to be. My sisters are my comfort since my parents died. Don't get me wrong, I love my brothers, and cherish time with them, but it is different.

I am also working through some spiritual matters. I look at many of you as such an inspiration. You make me want to be a better Christian, a better Catholic. I am just struggling with how to find the time to do everything I would like to do. That goes for my prayer life as well as my life as a wife, mother, sister, aunt and friend. A friend emailed me recently that she felt like I was an inspiration because of everything I do. I wanted to scream, "Not me!" I really don't feel that way at all.

Perhaps I am just tired (Jamie-Alex gave up her sleeping through the night! She is back up at 3 AM.), perhaps I need to pray more ( I know I do), perhaps I just needed a snow day. Oh well.


Anne said...

I was also looking forward to a snow day. In fact, I could completely relate to most of this post...missing parents, sisters are best friends, spiritual struggles.

It's still snowing...go ahead and bake your bread, you'll feel better!

Karyn @ Candarbry Garden said...

I think we all get to the point of feeling this way at some time or another. I just wanted to show you that you are indeed an inspiration to other women. You just had your fourth child for heavens sake, give yourself a little break. Titus 2 v4-5 (speaking to the "older" women) "That they may teach the youn women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed."
I would say you are doing so, inspiring other young mothers to live a life that is pleasing to God. Kudos kiddo!
Hope you get your snow day soon!

Sarah - Kala said...

It's the season!
Just do the little things . . . focus on the good - there's more of it than we realize, I think!
Prayers for you and your sister. It's stressful, yeah? But, hang on for the ride. Watch a funny movie.

Christy said...

I am so sorry about your sister. My uncle just had the same surgery and is 37 years old. He got through it with flying colors-I will be praying that your sister will as well. She has a lot of support and that means everything when it comes to recovering.

I have been feeling the EXACT same way as you about my spiritual life, home life...everything. Satan loves to prey on our weaknesses and insecurities and rob our joy. Especially this time of year. He doesn't want us focusing on Christ-he wants us focused on everything else.

I hope your week gets better and that you are able to rest more. WIll has not slept through the night yet-I KNOW how hard lack of sleep is. That in itself makes everything seem worse.

Christine said...

We all are called to greatness. HOWEVER, not all of us are called to craft this or that...cook the right color food for every feast day...etc.....

Prayer should come first. It really brings peace. It is not always easy but just do it. We also can pray when folding clothes and doing dishes or when we hug our husband..pray for him.

PLEASE do not compare yourself to others out in the blog world. Blogs can make anyone look perfect. We are all human out here with troubles and struggles. Kids need to be loved. Just love'em. Smile at them. Let them see your eyes shine. Nothing worse then a frustrated mother trying to be perfect.

REMEMBER 3am feedings do not last forever...."This too shall pass!"

Jamie said...

ahhhhhh, ((((big hugs))))

When it snows, I always want a lot too, might as well, it's better than a inch or two, like we got (I think we got maybe 3 or 4 drifted snow...I got stuck in our steep drive way today after the funeral)

I usually do a whole day and night of cookie baking and just decided last night I just can't do it this year. Bridget is just too fussy in the evenings (it ends up lasting until like 8pm...with me finishing it all....oh, and the cleanup!) SO I decided to just not do the cookie cutter ones, with the frosting and toppings,(can you hear the kids saying "ahhhh, why not?") we will just do the sugar cookies that you press down with a glass and sprinkle. (much easier & actually much tastier, just not as much fun for the kiddos) I might try those peanut butter cookies with the kiss on top...the kids will still have fun Christmas memories, just a little different and easier this year.

Babies take time. Your baby is your prayer sometimes. Pray when you feed her at 3am. Even if it's just "help me Lord".

Just simplify.

You are doing great, and not giving yourself enough credit! Just keep doing your best, that's all you can do!

Nikki said...

I will be praying for you and my sister. I know how trying this can be. We found out today my sister is being moved to the top of the heart transplant list next week. It is so hard to think this surgery is (hopefully) around the corner.

I am a firm believer there is very little a good night's sleep won't help- at least a little.

Hang in there and know there are many praying for you.

gramma2many said...

Ok, sweetie, this is your pretend mom speaking..............never, never, never judge your Christianity on the expectations of others!!! You know deep in your heart that you know, love and serve Him. That is what is necessary. Take care of yourself first and foremost and everything else will fall into place.
Trust in Him for the results for your Sister that He has already decided. He is your comfort and your strength. Stay strong and faithful and He will never leave you or forsake you.
You are a beautiful person and loved by many. Continue to be just who you are!!!!!

Nancy said...

It's ok to feel like you're in a funk! Actually, it's ok to BE in a funk! Right now, it's your Advent...the period of waiting! Waiting for your daughter to sleep through the night, waiting for more hours in the day to get things done, waiting...waiting...waiting! You are right where God wants you at the moment!
You are an inspiration to me, Therese! You are an awesome wife, an awesome mom and an awesome Catholic. Hang in there...give yourself some leeway on your funkitude! We've all been there!
Oh...and your sister is covered in prayer!
Hold on to the Blessed Mother...she will see you through this temporary desert. Keep a finger rosary with you at all times!
It's really a bother that I don't live closer!

Anonymous said...

Hi Therese,
I still miss my dad so much that it hurts. He was always my backstop - someone who was always there for me, so I really do know what you're going through.

Keep on praying, for God knows what you're going through, too, and know that I'm still praying for you, too.

God bless you,

Herd Momma said...

Hate that I missed out on cyber hugging you yesterday. So here's a really really big one! {{{{{{{{{{THERESE!!!!}}}}}} And girl let me tell you I am totally feeling like neglect Mom of the year. I have let tiredness and busyness take over and we have let some of our Advent rituals slack big time. But last night I gave myself a talk. Instead of thinking OH MY GOSH Christmas is only 2 weeks away! Think of it more as WOW I still have 2 more weeks til Christmas. So we'll make it friend. And psst...you are a great inspiration and a Blessed Catholic friend to me. I treasure you. And not because you're perfect but because you're real. Love and Hugs.

Kim H. said...

Wow! Being a last commenter really is a good thing. I got to read all the wonderful advice from your awesome bloggy friends. Therese, isn't this wonderful how we women lift each other up just when we need it most. This is exactly why I blog. Know we're all out in the trenches with you -- not always dealing with the same things -- but we can encourage and most importantly pray for you and WITH you.

And Christine says it best. Go to prayer and you'll find your peace. HE never fails us.

Hang in there -- and yes -- big ((((((HUGS)))))))