27 December 2007

Daddies get to do the fun stuff...What?!?

For the past week, Andy and I have been having a parenting discussion. It is about having fun with your kids vs. being the disciplinarian.

Last night's discussion went like this:"Your Aunt Peg called...she mentioned that Diane had tickets to the Walking with Dinosaurs show and Diane is taking Lizzie. I wish we were taking the boys," I said.

"Why isn't Grady taking Lizzie? I don't mean to sound sexist, but that is a Daddy thing," my husband said totally innocently.

"I can't believe you just said that! Why do only daddies get to do the fun stuff?"

Yesterday was only the latest in what seems like an on-going discussion about parental roles. I have given this a lot of thought lately. Why do daddies have more fun? Is it the fact that, at least in our house, I am home all of the time with the kids. I do get stuck with some of the more mundane tasks in our household, especially where the kids are concerned:

"Mom, I have a spelling test tomorrow!"
"More juice, Mama!"
"Mom, will you wipe my hinie?" (This one is from my son, Drew, usually, at 5 AM, and ALWAYS to me.)

I also seem to be the one to have to discipline them and keep things in line:

"Stop playing soccer in the house, boys!"
"Michael, don't hit your brother!"
"Drew, you need to wipe your own hinie!"

And then Daddy comes home, the fun begins! The wrestling, the tickling, the chasing. Sometimes I feel like I have 4 boys, not 3! He does get to have more fun with them, but WHY? Last weekend, he took them tubing IN THE SNOWSTORM! Last night, he let Peter stay up later to watch Survivor:China. Am I too focused on the mundane that I can't have fun with my children? Maybe so...But , let me tell you, when all of the fun is over, and my boys are tired and ready for bed, it is me that they come to for one more hug, one last kiss, and that makes it all worth it!


Colleen said...

Since my husband is gone so often, I have had the opportunity to do lots of "fun" things with the kids. But when he is home, he gets to do the "fun" things that I don't think are so much fun and that works for me!

brainella said...

Oh, this is SO very true. I'm the one who gets to comfort and feed. Daddy gets to play the games and have the fun.

Then again, I'm the one that gets lots of kisses -- Daddy only gets one. :)

mep said...

It ends up that my husband gets to do more of the "fun stuff" too, usually because I need to be at home with the baby and toddler. However, he misses out on a lot of the day-to-day adorable moments. He also misses out on most of the messes and breakdowns and a lot of the poop. I'm not sure if it evens out or not!

I'd love to hear more about your online teaching job.

Karen, author of "My Funny Dad, Harry" said...

Here's a suggestion, do something fun with your boys before Daddy gets home. Maybe a little water fight with the hose? How about a surprise trip for ice cream? Or maybe you could just goof around with them some during the day.

Don't let dad have all the fun!

Visiting from Friday Field Trip.

Dianna@KennedyAdventures said...

Isn't it funny -- but in my house, my husband thinks I get to do all the fun stuff! Probably because I'm the one who does all the planning for events, etc.

Just saw you were also a member of Catholic Mothers Online -- be sure and drop by Saints and Scripture Sundays sometime!